We’d like to know a little bit about you for our files, but we don’t like regurgitating press releases or asking the easy questions. At Tone Deaf we only ask the tough questions, so just hold still, grit your teeth, clench your buttocks and be still while we put on the rubber gloves, apply the thumbscrews, and pull out our thermometer while you open up and say ahhhhhhhhhhh… Truthful answers only or we drink your rider while you’re on stage.

Who gets the most ‘off stage action’ in the band? What’s the secret to their success?

Frank by a long shot! His secret is having a beard that is so mesmerising everyone he meets wants to touch it, get photographed with it, steals bits of it and make love to it!

Have you ever been arrested? Where were you, and what was it for?

No, I am much too clever to be caught!

What’s been the worst day job you’ve ever had?

Once worked refurbishing a tired old commission housing building in London’s east end, had to deal with getting spat on, abused for making too much noise, non-stop rain for a month, guys on site getting mugged at knife point, someone even threw a cactus plant at me from several stories above! But to top it all off, my supervisor and I had just finished a paving job just outside the front door of the building. (it looked shit hot too!) We stopped for lunch, and while sitting in the lunch portable we heard this strange thump come from near our paving job. We returned to find that one of the residents had committed suicide by jumping off the roof of the building onto our pavers totally ruining our days work…Asshole!!!!!

Sex, drugs and groupies – In what order do you prefer them and how often?

Sex – From my hot sexy gorgeous wife!
Groupies – Fun to talk and flirt with, also provide handy mental imagery for times when wife is not feeling as accommodating!
Drugs – Never done ‘em and probably never will!

Take us back to the first gig you went to. Where was it and what was the venue?

I don’t remember…it may have been the Alternative Nations festival which was held at Olympic Park, the glass house and some other venue. I remember lots of rain at the outside stages, before going inside and to the front row for all-girl band L7 where there was lots of sweat, then back outside to see Faith No More. I also remember my friend buying a rare vinyl copy of the Faith No More ‘Epic’ single for a considerable amount of cash only have it destroyed by the weather and hours of moshing and crowd surfing whilst in my back pack. He nearly cried! I have never really been a fan of festivals since!

What’s your favourite site to download music from and do you ever pay for it? Can we find any of your releases there?

Limewire! Our releases aren’t there because no one wants them!

What’s the furthest you’d go to win over a new fan?

At a festival in Colac recently Chris (one of our guitarists) used the Indian tea bag technique (google it!) to win over a punchy passed out dude. It actually went a hell of a lot better than we had thought! I think he may be a fan for life!

Right, thanks for answering the tough questions, tell us about upcoming gigs/tours and releases?

We have been working on a new EP called ‘AAARRGH!’ for the past couple of months which is sounding a lot better than we expected! We will be launching the EP over two nights,

Friday November 19th The Nash in Geelong with ‘Poppin Momas’ and ‘Bitter Sweet Kicks’ and then the big one,

Saturday November 20th East Brunswick Club with ‘Money for Rope’ and ‘Brat Farrar’ including a full pyro show bigger than anything we have done before! We are also pre-selling Barbarion Battle Armoury’s at http://www.barbarion.net/shop.html. The pack includes an official Barbarion battle axe, Viking horns, a t-shirt, a copy of our album ‘Feast On The Beast’ and entry to the gig for just $60! Every warrior must have one!