We’d like to know a little bit about you for our files, but we don’t like regurgitating press releases or asking the easy questions. At Tone Deaf we only ask the tough questions, so just hold still, grit your teeth, clench your buttocks and be still while we put on the rubber gloves, apply the thumbscrews, and pull out our thermometer while you open up and say ahhhhhhhhhhh… Truthful answers only or we drink your rider while you’re on stage.

Who gets the most ‘off stage action’ in the band? What’s the secret to their success?

Very, very, very haaard to say, as the whole band is like some gigantic rutting beast, constantly on heat, emitting irresistible scents to the world at large, seducing huge numbers of the population into wild Dionysian orgies. I think it definitely has a lot to do with the smell.

Have you ever been arrested? Where were you, and what was it for?

Only a few times. Firstly in Cairns, many moons ago, for riding a bike drunkenly into a police car,” drunken in charge of a velocepede”, for which I earned a night in the Cairns lock up, with a load of real criminals, and breakfast at the courthouse.
There have been other times, equally as ridiculous!.

What’s been the worst day job you’ve ever had?

Again there have been quite a few, but I think potato picking in Cornwall probably takes the biscuit; scrabbling thru the dirt looking for spuds, for 2 quid an hour, is pretty close to a chain gang.

Sex, drugs and groupies – In what order do you prefer them and how often?

The combination of sex and drugs, is my preferred breakfast, usually mixed with rock and roll, traditionally, an then little top ups thru tha day, until bedtime. But groupies freak me out, unless they come bearing gifts of sustenance.

Take us back to the first gig you went to. Where was it and what was the venue?

Me and a mate, went to see the Beach boys In 1988, at Wembley Arena, when we were fourteen, and we were up on the seats, plastic seat surfing, pretty daggy. Memorably, a couple of years later, I saw Ozric tentacles, the Orb, and Primal scream who performed the album Screamadelica, first time around, at Glastonbury festival, one night on particularly good acid, and it’s still one of the best gigs I’ve ever been to.

What’s your favourite site to download music from and do you ever pay for it? Can we find any of your releases there?

What is download?

What’s the furthest you’d go to win over a new fan?

I lent someone my kidney once, it was raining.

Right, here’s the plug section – tell us about upcoming gigs/tours and releases.

We’ve got a gig coming up this Friday the 25th of March at Red Bennies in Prahan, with the wonderfully vaudevillian Friby girls, doors opening at 7.30pm, $15. Then we’ve got a couple more shows, and we disappear an record a new album, which we shall be unleashing in the Spring. Cheers!