We’d like to know a little bit about you for our files, however we don’t like regurgitating press releases or asking the easy questions. No-one gets out of the Tone Deaf Interrogation lightly, so just hold still, grit your teeth, clench your buttocks and be still while we put on the rubber gloves, apply the thumbscrews, and pull out our thermometer while you open up and say ahhhhhhhhhhh… Truthful answers only or we drink your rider while you’re on stage.

Everyone joins or forms a band to get laid. If your band represents your sex life are you Casanova or spending plenty of time doing the five knuckle shuffle?

I never formed a band to get laid. Bands that do that are a pathetic joke. It’s about the music. Nothing else. I’ll get laid on my own time thanks.

We don’t want to know about the painfully hip bands your press release says you’re influenced by. Take us back to your bedroom when you were 14. What band posters did you have on the wall?

Ice Cube, Wu Tang and Cypress Hill.

What’s been your worst gig and why are you glad there’s no footage of it on Youtube … yet?

There was a gig at the Corner Hotel where we set up a bar behind the amps. That was REALLY a shit gig.

Tomorrow’s payday, so we’ve only got $20 to get you drunk. Where do we go and what do we buy with it?

We go to my living room and buy a cask of wine and listen to tunes. Fuck, $20 can hardly get you fed, let alone drunk – CHEAPSKATES!

We’ve been looking in the $2 bin at Dixons Recycled and also bidding on eBay – what releases are we looking for there that your band has put out?

For The Cops: The Cops E.P., Stomp On Tripwires, 80 In The Shade E.P., Drop It In Their Laps. My debut solo record The Black Book Of The Universe has only been out a couple of weeks so hopefully it’s not in there…..

Suppose we put a gun to your head and force you to kiss a member of another Australian band. Who, which band and why?

ALL of Expatriate because I love those guys so much. I had the most fun I’ve ever had on tour when we did the Strange Creatures double headline tour. Debaucherous, dangerous, sexy, now i’m getting really misty eyed and sentimental…..

Simon Carter headlines The Annandale Hotel in Sydney this Thursday 5th August with Money For Rope. His debut solo album “Black Book Of The Universe” is out now.