We’d like to know a little bit about you for our files, however we don’t like regurgitating press releases or asking the easy questions. No-one gets out of the Tone Deaf Interrogation lightly, so just hold still, grit your teeth, clench your buttocks and be still while we put on the rubber gloves, apply the thumbscrews, and pull out our thermometer while you open up and say ahhhhhhhhhhh… Truthful answers only or we drink your rider while you’re on stage.

Kate Wilson of the band gives us the low down.

Everyone joins or forms a band to get laid. If your band represents your sex life are you Casanova or spending plenty of time doing the five knuckle shuffle?

I don’t know about this analogy. You pleasure yourself, go sit in a van together for hours and have it off on stage for money? Sloppy seconds are something to aspire to? Those seminal bands of whom it is said “Everyone who saw them started their own band” like the Velvet Underground and Sonic Youth – what the hell does that make them? Whatever it is you seem to be getting at, be thoroughly assured, we do it in amounts that are considered “normal” for young, healthy individuals.

We don’t want to know about the painfully hip bands your press release says you’re influenced by. Take us back to your bedroom when you were 14. What band posters did you have on the wall?

I had, amongst the standard kid stuff (That hot girl from Hanson, Justin Bieber’s ultrasound), lots of Australian indie band pics on my wall, like Drop City, Underground Lovers, The Meanies, Sidewinder, Glide, Even, Automatic, Smudge, Clouds etc… Anyway, the funny thing is, being in a band, I now get to meet a bunch of these people. It’s actually really creepy. You’re introduced to someone and thinking “Yeah, uh huh, I had your picture on my wall for years”. I have friends who I would have harangued with idolatry as a fifteen year old fangirl. I hope none of them remember!

What’s been your worst gig and why are you glad there’s no footage of it on Youtube … yet?

I don’t think we’ve had anything bad happen that would translate well to video. A bad gig is generally a boring affair incorporating dead gear, inaudible foldback, and maybe a bit of cursing – it’s not as though we have pyrotechnics hilariously misfiring into anyone’s crotch, or a comedically rotund member who regularly falls through the stage. Whilst seeing people get angry can be pretty funny, it really has to be done properly. For example, when Henry Rollins combined violent rage with miniscule shorts, it was an utter stroke of genius. I’m sure there’s a niche is out there for us.

Tomorrow’s payday, so we’ve only got $20 to get you drunk. Where do we go and what do we buy with it?

Ooh, that’s a hard one. Everyone likes drinking different things. Do we have to get drunk? Cough, wink etc… We’d definitely stand outside the bottle shop for at least 30 minutes, everyone refusing to commit to a position. The words “I don’t really mind, whatever you guys want to do” would be uttered no less than two hundred times. We’d probably, at some point, end up sitting in a park. Maybe we would get some chips too? For the record, if I was personally charged with endrunkening a family of four for a twenny, I’d take a goon box to the park, and most certainly blow my last few bucks on some form of fried potato. Economising or not, that’s just a top night out!

We’ve been looking in the $2 bin at Dixons Recycled and also bidding on eBay – what releases are we looking for there that your band has put out?

We have one 7” out so far, which I think is almost gone. We’re about to put a new single up on iTunes called “Turn on your mind” just this week! Our first EP is out later this year too, which means it should start hitting the second hand bins just in time for Christmas. Jingle bells!

Suppose we put a gun to your head and force you to kiss a member of another Australian band. Who, which band and why?

This is a bit of a toughie, and I gave it lots of consideration. In the end, I decided it’s got to be a real Aussie Icon – someone who resonates with the masses. Maybe someone like Barnsey , or whoever’s winning Australian Idol at the time. Anyway, I can see the headline: “I was forced to kiss Aussie music legend at gunpoint by online webzine”. A killer ‘Real life read’ like that would nab me upwards of $600 at ‘That’s Life’, which would thoroughly circumvent the problem we encountered in question four, and relieve you of your need to bottom feed your way through the bargain bins. It would probably make a powerful enough story to broach the chasm to your more ‘upmarket’ mags, like ‘Women’s Weekly’! If we could somehow incorporate the idea that I may be banging a cricketer, we’d be talking five figures for an exclusive. Let’s make this happen!

The Laurels play a double header single launch with Belles Will Ring and The Demon Parade opening at the Northcote Social Club this Friday 23rd July from 8:30pm.

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