We’d like to know a little bit about you for our files, but we don’t like regurgitating press releases or asking the easy questions. At Tone Deaf we only ask the tough questions, so just hold still, grit your teeth, clench your buttocks and be still while we put on the rubber gloves, apply the thumbscrews, and pull out our thermometer while you open up and say ahhhhhhhhhhh… Truthful answers only or we drink your rider while you’re on stage.

Who gets the most ‘off stage action’ in the band? What’s the secret to their success?

We’re all currently in relationships (to my knowledge). Although James has probably had the best track record in recent times. His secret is to not shower for days on end, which increases his natural pheromones, as well as drawing on the sympathy from passers by, which sometimes include potential suitors.

Have you ever been arrested? Where were you, and what was it for?

I think a policeman took my id for drinking in public, but unfortunately, my own personal criminal record is non existent. I should hope James has been arrested before, he thinks he’s well hard.

What’s been the worst day job you’ve ever had?

I’m still yet to have a “day” job. I used to work in a kitchen when I was in year 12. Don’t ever go to Fiorelli in Camberwell, that’s all I’ll say.

Sex, drugs and groupies – In what order do you prefer them and how often?

Groupies first, you can’t do the other two on your own. Then drugs, which makes the sex as good as possible. How often? You can’t answer a rhetorical question, that’s what makes it rhetorical.

Take us back to the first gig you went to. Where was it and what was the venue?

The Palace (the old/actual one, in St Kilda), and it was a double header with The Hoodoo Gurus and Spiderbait, supported by a young British India, who were then a Jet tribute band (it’s true). Although in a past life, I was the “Judas” guy at the infamous Dylan gig in Manchester. It wasn’t a sledge, I just wanted him to play louder. History will say it worked so I’m a hero.

What’s your favourite site to download music from and do you ever pay for it? Can we find any of your releases there?

The only actual “irony” about hipsters is that in spite of their supposed disassociation to seemingly everything, they are devoutly loyal to arguably the biggest corporation in the world. When I do download, it’s through the download software of said icorporation. Our stuff is on there.

What’s the furthest you’d go to win over a new fan?

I’d watch a really bad movie, and meet their Nan. But not their parents.

Right, thanks for answering the tough questions, tell us about upcoming gigs/tours and releases?

We’re playing at The Grace Darling Hotel in Collingwood, with The Kremlin Succession and Boogie Monster, on Friday November 26. It’s a single launch. It’s off our EP, which as well as having a record label’s logo on the back, has a few copies left in stores as well as online. We’re hitting the studio again in December, with Victorian tax payers money in hand.